They say you can’t have it all in life. Maybe we can. Imagine a scenario when we cease to be, yet we leave an impression which would make no one forget us. No, I don’t mean suicide bombings or any similar activity. And again, FYI, I don’t even mean loud farts in our deathbeds. It’s like this. We should put a thought into our epitaphs and get words chiseled in stone for ages.
Now, assumptively thinking, here’s what our epitaphs would read in accordance to one’s personality and characteristics. And yes, I know many of us would be cremated instead of being buried but then, who cares when one’s finished.
‘I told you I was sick. I thought you understood my missed call. Phone calls and text messages are expensive.’
- Abhishek Mukherjee.
‘The undiscovered country, from whose bourn; no traveller returns.’
- Amanda.
‘Here lies the body of Anurag Kotoky, done to death by a banana. It wasn’t the fruit that laid him low, but the skin of the thing that made him go. Oye Kela.’
- Anurag Kotoky.
‘A gentleman and a gentle man, ultimately remained gentle. His last words- Uffo.’
- Baharul Islam.
‘Is death the final sleep or the final awakening? What’s my point? What’s my point? Oh fuck, I asked the question twice. Only twice.’
- Hitesh Iplani.
‘She did it the hard way.’
- Miranda.
‘At least I died a feminist way defending women.’
- Monica.
‘We don’t know life; how can we know death?’
- Nancy.
‘I swam the seven oceans, I was a fucking swim champ but the jelly-fish thought otherwise, though it felt like a blowjob.’
- Patrick.
‘Hee hee-haw. Hee hee. I’m still giggling.’
- Rihanna.
‘Gone, but not forgiven.’
- Terence.
‘In my entire life, I dressed as though Stevie Wonder was my personal designer.’
- Ved Prakash.
‘So we must part, my body (my bazooka), you and I; who have spent so many pleasant years together. It’s sorry to lose your company, who clove to me so close.’
- Vincent.
Disclaimer-
Some of the words have been drafted from Hamlet and RD. Anyway, no offence to anyone. If offended, then great, thank you.